First Quarter Review

Well, today is Thursday March 26th and it is hard to believe that the first quarter is almost behind us. I was always told that time would go by much faster after I had children and it is so true. Sometimes when time is moving at such a rapid pace it is easy to let our focus become scattered. Most of us start the New Year with a list of resolutions. We write the list with enthusiasm and feel very energized as we review it. We think to ourselves; "This is going to be the year that I get organized, live healthy, volunteer my time, paint the house, etc...". We write these resolutions with the very best intentions, but often times we get off track and miss place our list only to forget about it until the following New Year. This is why it is so important to do a quarterly review.

What exactly is a quarterly review and how do you do it? It is simple, find your list of New Year Resolutions and take a look at it. Have you crossed anything off your list? It is human nature to want to feel like we are accomplishing something. Go over your list and cross off or highlight anything that your have finished. This will give you a rewarding feeling and stimulates you to want to do more just so you can cross more off. It is funny how that works, but you can really trick yourself into getting more done by simply crossing stuff off your list.

Now, review the items that are left. Pick the three that rank highest on the importance scale and put a little star next to them. Take a clean sheet of paper and divide it into three sections and label them 1, 2, and 3. Write your top three selections on the page, one in each section. Now under each item write A, B, and C. Here I want you to list three things that you can do for each item that will get the ball rolling. For instance, if your top three items consisted of painting the house, signing your child up for karate, and spending more time with your spouse, your paper may look like this:

1.) PAINT THE HOUSE

A.) go to the paint store and select a few colors

B.) call 3 contractors and get estimates

C.) contact the home owner's association to get color approval

2.) SIGN KIDS UP FOR KARATE

A.) look in the phone book to see who offers classes

B.) visit the schools and meet with the instructor

C.) make arrangements for your child to have a free 1 wk trial

3.) SPEND MORE TIME WITH SPOUSE

A.) talk to your spouse and figure out what you would like to do together

B.) pick 2 nights per month as designated "date nights"

C.) call friends and family and pre-arrange baby sitting for these nights

Now that you have this sub-list you can eagerly get started. Try to do at least one thing on the sub-list everyday until you have completed the list in its entirety and of course you must remember to cross things off as you go. Once you have finished all the items on your sub-list it is time to review your resolutions again and pick the three that rank most important again and repeat the process.

You will find that once you get started you wont want to stop. You may even think of new things to add to your list of resolutions as you go and that is great. The more you do, the more you will want to do. Motivation definitely has a snowball effect and once you get started it is hard to stop.

It is time to get moving and get refocused. All it takes is a little effort. Lets make 2009 the year of accomplishment.

Nothing to Fear but Fear Itself

F antasized
E xperiences
A ppearing
R eal


Lets take a few moments and remember a time when we overcame a fear. It could be anything...the fear of public speaking, the fear of flying, the fear of water, etc... How did you overcome that fear? I will share with you a funny story about how I overcame my fear on snakes.

My first real job was as a kennel tech at a large pet store. I was in charge of taking care of all the cute furry animals and somebody else was in charge of the reptiles and fish. One morning I received a phone call from the owner saying the guy who took care of the reptiles was going to be sick and they needed me to also clean and feed the animals on the reptile side of the store. I figured it would be no big real and I happily agreed. When I was done taking care of the puppies and kittens I went to the other side and started with the iguanas. Next was the snakes. We had 2 farely small ball pythons. I figured I would quickly give them some fresh water and that would be the end of it. But, that was not the case. When I opened the cage I noticed the cover seemed loose. Then I noticed the snakes were not in the cage! Of course I got a bad case of the eeby geebies and started looking on the floor for them. I had a dust pan in my hand and figured I would scoop them up and toss them in the cage and call it a day. I could not find those 2 snakes anywhere! I pulled their cage out and as I glanced up, there they were! They had wrapped themselves around the fluorescent light bulbs above their cage. I was almost delusional with fear and panic. I just knew they wanted to bite me. But I was the only one in the store and I had to get the store ready to open. I took a few moments to regain my composure and then I did what I had to do. I basically had to prey them each off of the light bulbs and put them back in their cage. Of course neither of them bit me and I survived. When it was all said and done I actually felt bad for them. I figured they must have been cold if they broke out of their cage to wrap around the light bulb. Anyways I am no longer scared of snakes. I would never want one as a pet, but I am no longer scared.

Ralph Waldo Emerson said "Do the thing you fear and the death of fear is certain." And it is so true. Fear is really a figment of our imagination. The best way to make fear vanish is to look it in the face and just do it.

Attracting Better Relationships

We all know that the Law of Attraction states that "like attracts like". This means we are attracted to people who match our vibrational field. Knowing this, how do we use the Law of Attraction to "attract" better relationships into our life?

There are a few simple strategies we can use on a daily basis that will raise our vibration and raise the quality of our relationships. Lets start strategy #1 by making a list of all the qualities we would find in our perfect friend. By make a list, I actually mean make a list and write it on paper. We may want to be friends with somebody who is honest, loyal, ambitious, smart, passionate, friendly, motivated, etc... Now take a look at the list and see how many of these qualities you already posses. Which areas could you use a little help. The best way to attract people into your life with the qualities your looking for is to practice refining these very qualities in yourself. Remember "like attracts like". So if you are snobby, materialistic, and self-centered what type of friends do you think you will attract? On the other hand, if you are kind, loving, generous, and friendly what type of friends do you think you will attract?

Strategy #2 involves using James A Ray's strategy of aligning attention with intention. This is like tending to a garden. Whatever you give attention to grows and flourishes. If you are constantly complaining to yourself or other people about the quality of your friends, you are in turn giving attention to how bad the relationship is and in return you will get more of the "bad". On the other hand, if you focus on the great qualities each friend has while over looking the bad you will notice that you will begin to see more of the good. Everybody has at least a few great qualities within them. Once again, like attracts like, so the more you focus on the good the more good there is to focus on.

Strategy#3 calls for you to evaluate where you are spending your free time. Where do you like to hang out? Are you spending a lot of free time in bars, finding friends there, and later complaining that they are too rowdy and drink too much? If you want to find friends that are inspiring, you must first figure out what inspires you and find a group of like minded people to hang out with. If you are interested in art, join an art club. If you are interested in politics and community relations start going to your local city council meetings. If you are interested in helping others, find a charity that inspires you and join their fundraising committee. I am not saying that it is totally impossible to find good quality friends sitting at a bar at 2am, but your chances are better if you look somewhere else.

Using these strategies may feel a little uncomfortable at first and that is okay. Growing is supposed to be challenging. When we chose the comfortable route we do not grow and we all know that "if we're not growing we're dying". Again think of a garden, when the gardener stops tending, the plants stop growing, and soon they begin to die. It is a simple fact of life. We must stay challenged to evolve and grow. Challenge yourself to fit your "perfect friend" profile, challenge yourself to stop complaining and focus on the good, and challenge yourself to join a club, commitee, or group that inspires you.

Ask And It Shall Be Given

Ask, and it shall be given to you;

seek and ye shall find;

knock and it shall be opened unto you.

For every one that asketh, receiveth;

and he that seeketh, findeth;

and to him that knocketh

it shall be opened.

~Matthew 7:7-8

Most of us have heard or read these words before, but how many of us have really taken them to heart? Studies have shown that marriages suffer from lack of communication. Many of us feel that if our spouse really loved us, then we would not have to ask them to do "this or "that" for us because they would automatically know what we want and need. Often times relationships with friends and family can be strained for the very same reasons. We expect the people in our lives to just know what we want without being told.

The Bible says; "Ask and it shall be given to you". Well, what if it is true? What if all we have to do is ask? We are all born with the ability to ask for what we want, if you don't believe me spend some time with my 2 year old son. My neighbors will tell you that mimics that of a broken record at times. That persistence and the ability to ask no matter how ridiculous the request is given to all of us as a birthright and somewhere along the way many of us lost the ability to ask. We get conditioned throughout life to stop being a pest, don't question authority, just shut up and listen, and to do what the doctor says, etc... But what if we just took the time to ask for what we want, ask for that helping hand, and ask for some advice.

I used to be one of those people who almost never asked for what I wanted. I would give hints, but I would almost never come right out and ask. It took me forever to ask for a day off at work. The anxiety of thinking about asking would almost make me sick. Whenever a friend would ask me what I wanted to do, I would always respond with "I don't care, whatever you want to do is fine."

I remember one night, about 4 or 5 yrs ago, going to bed sad because my husband had said earlier in the day that he would rub my feet before we went to bed. When night time came and did not grab my feet and start rubbing, I foolishly thought he did not care. The following morning I was still a little bummed out about it. Rod could sense something was wrong. When he asked I of course was reluctant to tell him, but with some prodding I finally told him. His response was simple. He apologised for forgetting and very plainly said "Why didn't you just ask me? I would have done it for you, I just forgot."

Why didn't I just ask? Hmmm, I am not sure why I didn't, but that is when I started to realise that asking for something is not bad. People are not mind readers and no matter how well your husband (or wife) and friends know you, they can not read your mind. It never hurts to ask whether it is help or advice that you need, the worst that can happen is someone will tell you "no" and it has been my personal experience that most people will do whatever they can to help you. Life is too short to go around scared to ask for what we want. Make a point to have an opinion when asked, ask for help when you need it, and live a happy life.

I will leave you with with the quote from W. Clement Stone;

"If there is something to gain and nothing to lose by asking, by all means ask!"

Free E-zine

Well I am off to NY to visit my family for a week. My grandmother's birthday is tomorrow and I am going up there to celebrate with her. The internet connection in upstate NY is transient at best, so I will not be posting to the blog while I'm up there. I do want to take a quick moment to encourage everybody to sign up for Jim Rohn's free e-zine. It is a email publication fill with valuable information (and it's FREE).

The link is http://jimrohn.com/?kbid=9487 .

See you when I get back!

Coincidentally, I came across this little saying today. Thought it was appropriate considering today's post.

Sticks & Stones

I am almost 100% positive that anybody who has lived through elementary school has heard the words "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me." on more than one occasion. There is a good chance that all of us have actually used the phrase a few times ourselves. What do you think about this school yard phrase? Do you think it rings true, or are you like myself and feel that words are one of the most damaging weapons the human race has at their disposal when used ruthlessly.

Think about it for a moment, a broken leg will heal in 6 weeks. How many people are spending hours of their adulthood in the shrinks office due to the residual effects of damaging words. Sticks and stones may break our bones, but bones will heal easily. Hurtful words will linger in our minds and consume our thoughts. The ironic thing is that words can have a negative effect on both the person saying them and the person receiving them. Negativity is like an infectious disease and it spreads quite rapidly.

It is our responsibility, as positive people living in society, to keep a leash on our tongue. We must think about the words we use and choose them carefully. People are very impressionable no matter what their age. It does none of us any good to live in a society full of damaged souls, yet we have everything to gain from living in a society filled with happiness, health, and confidence. Sometimes hurtful words role off our tongues so easy that we are unconsciously using them. Now is the time to get conscious and make an effort to say positive. This is even more important if there are children in the picture. Lets set a good example and stay positive.