The Margarita Ball

This year I had the privilege of attending the Margarita Ball. It is a black tie charity event where the cost of attending is a generous toy donation. The directors of the Margarita Society take the donated toys and divide them between a few agencies, with my favorite agency; The Children's Advocacy Center, being one of the receivers. I took my friend, Trena, as my date because my husband had to stay home with our children. When we saw the gigantic pile of donated toys we were aw struck and covered in cold chills! It was amazing! Trena had her camera and took a few pictures, which I am going to post so everybody can see what an amazing event this was. The pictures are a little dim due to the low lighting, but you can get the idea. Proof once again that great things can happen when people work together.

Pictures of the GOODS!!

The Goods!!

I am so excited to post these pictures!

The tally shows we have rounded up:
13 packs of markers
10 boxes of crayons
10 packs of colored pencils5 packs of colored construction paper
3 packs of white drwing paper
8 pair scissors
4 large paint brushes
1 pack of 30 small paint brushes
6 bottles of glue
1 pack of glue sticks
3 (8) packs of glitter
3 (5) packs of glitter glue
1 pack of water colors
1 (10) pack of paint
10 large bottles of paint
2 packs of pipe cleaners
1 (5000) pack of beads
1 HUGE box of misc craft supplies
2 packs of foam picture frames
17 3-ring binders
8 boxes of "shared" bandaides (meaning my kids took a few from each box)
4 packs of stickers
**AND Robin brought me in a huge supply of scrapbooking stickers that I forgot at work today**

And I almost forgot to mention a check for $80 and a check for $50

The Children's Advocacy Center

Anybody who knows me personally knows that I am a volunteer on the fundraising committee for the Children's Advocacy Center (CAC) of Volusia & Flagler Counties. The CAC helps & protects abused children in Volusia and Flagler counties.

Anybody interested in checking out the agency can follow this link http://www.childrensadvocacy.org/Welcome.html .

A few weeks ago the CAC let out a cry for help. They are $400,000 below budget and their counselors are in desperate need of art supplies for the art therapy program that they do with the children. I told Diane I would see what I could do to help round up some art supplies. I sent out a mass email asking everybody to pitch in and buy a few things. I figured if everybody could pitch in a little we would end up with a lot. I also asked my friends at work to pitch in. The response has been amazing! I have collected so much stuff, I can"t even believe it. Tuesday I asked one of my co-workers if she would take a lunch break with me this Friday to help me deliver all the stuff! I even recieved stuff from NY (thanks Peggy)!

Today Diane sent me an email with a "Christmas wish list" from FACTTS. When she sent the list I had to ask her who FACTTS was. Then she told me it is the "family and child trauma treatment services". In other words, the counselors that I have been gathering art supplies for. Anyways, the list included things like: picture frames, picture matting, art supplies, lockable journals, 1 inch 3 ring binders, scrapbook pages, stickers, postage stamps, and character bandaides. I told her I definitely had the art supplies covered and I would see what I could do about the rest of the stuff. You know how "they" say things happen for a reason, or "when you need something it will come to you"? Well, tonight instead of going to the gym, I met my husband at Walmart and decide to go check out their clearance isle. Wouldn't you know it, they had 1 inch 3 ring binders on clearance. They were regularly $3.50 on sale for $1.00!!! I filled the cart. I was so excited. I actually drew a crowd and a few ladies came over and said "Ooh, good idea, lets stock up". I just chuckled and told them they were not for me. The one lady said "Are they for your kid's school?" I said "No, they are only 3 and 1 yrs old. It will be a while before they need binders." Then I rounded up my husband and kids and we headed to the pharmacy to find bandaides. Xavier & Madison both love bandaides, especially the character bandaides. When we got to the isle Xavier saw me pick up a few boxes and he got excited. He wanted Diego and Spiderman and then Transformers. I had to stop him and explain to him that these bandaides were to share and he could help me pick them out, but we had to share them. It was so funny, as soon as we got home he wanted to "share" his bandaides. So I let him take a couple out of each box to keep and the rest he is sharing.

I am so excited to bring these donations into the agency. This just proves that we don't have to be millionaires to do great things. There is strength in numbers and when people band together there is no telling how far they can go. When I asked for help, I seriously thought that each of you would buy 1 item on the list and I would have a grocery bag full of stuff to donate. I seriously could fill the back of my SUV with all the stuff I have received. And that does not include the check donations I have received from a few of you.

YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME!! And I want you to know how much I appreciate all your help. I know it always seems like I am getting myself into "something" and asking for a donation, but it is for a great cause. These children are the future. They need to be looked after and properly cared for. Damaged children grow up to be damaged adults unless they are properly cared for and that is why abuse is such a vicious cycle. The CAC is such a great agency. I am so thankful that my friend Jill led to them. The CAC is so wonderful that they even work with a state program to protect the unborn babies with "high risk" mothers. They are amazing.

Once again, I want to tell all my friends {{{THANK YOU}}} for all your help!! I am going to try to take pictures tomorrow of all the stuff I have gathered so you can all see the end results of your efforts.

I Found My MAILBOX

So, I finally made a decision on which box I wanted to use as my "Mailbox to GOD". The World Market had such a great selection that it was hard to decide. My finally decision was the wooden elephant box. I have always loved elephants. They live in a tight matriarchal society where all the females in the "family" work together to raise the young. I adore them for there strong sense of family loyalty. They live by my favorite African proverb "It takes a village to raise a child". And besides, they are so cute!

I used my mailbox today. I was feeling unusually stressed out and agitated. I just couldn't shake the feeling. So, I decided to write a letter to "God" asking for some direction. I started the letter with "Dear God, I need your help" and went on to "complain" about what was bothering me....which was actually the lack of knowing what was agitating me. By the end of the letter I had already received the answers I was looking for. It was uncanny and kind of amazing. Now I feel like writing a "THANK YOU" letter and sticking it in there.

I don't want anybody to get turned off by my use of the word "GOD". I choose to use this word because to me it signifies strength and omniscience, an all knowing power. You can substitute the words "Universe", "Higher Power", "All Knowing Self", "Infinite Intelligence", or any other word of your choice. It really does not matter, the important thing is that when you need help or guidance you just ask. The answers will come quickly.

Mailbox to GOD

Most of you know that I attend a couple of teleseminar classes every month with 2 of my favorite mentors. One of last month's discussions led to the topic of having a "Mailbox to GOD". Since the teleseminar session ended I have been thinking that I want to write a post about it. Time slipped away from me and I never did sit down and take the time to write.

Then, 2 weeks ago our beloved Roxy passed. Roxy was our 5 1/2 yr old Rottweiler. I got her when she was only 10 weeks old and soon found out that she had a very serious heart condition, so serious that the Vet could not guarantee me that she would live 4 months. We were all very thankful that Roxy was able to be with us for as long as she was, but my heart literally felt like it was broken. It was a pain that I had never felt before in my 32 years of life. Every time I thought about her I would cry. This went on for 3 days straight. On the 3rd day I made the decision to pull myself together. I couldn't keep crying in front of my children. My 3yr old son would say "Mommy are you whining about Roxy again?". I took some time to figure out what would make me and my heart feel better. Then I remembered the post I was wanting to write about the "Mailbox to GOD". I figured the idea sounded great when it was presented to me, so I should put the theory to the test.

I sat down with a notebook and pen and wrote Roxy & God a letter that explained how much I loved her. I talked about how I picked her out of all the others. I had went to several breeders. I told her how I knew I was meant to be her "owner" because I would love her and give her a good life regardless of her heart condition. I told her how I loved the way she looked after all the kids in the neighborhood and how she was the perfect family dog. And how much Xavier & Madison loved and missed her. The letter ended up being 4 pages front and back. When I was done writing I pulled the pages out of my notebook and folded it envelope style. Then, I addressed it "To: Roxy/God" "Love: Mommy xoxo". I left it on the corner of the coffee table and walked away.

My husband asked if he could read it and I told him "yes and then make it disappear". After writing my letter I instantly felt better, I was smiling again. The next day I could talk about her with people at work and the neighbors without crying. I could actually feel happy when I talked about her and feel the gratitude that I knew I should feel for being able to have her for the 5 1/2 years of life she was given.

The simple act of writing that letter took me from being an emotional wreck back to the "cup is half full" perspective.

In our original discussion, we were told to use an actual box to put the letter in to signify the "mailbox". It could be a decorated shoe box or it could be an elaborate hand carved wooden box, or anything in between. I have found a few very nice wood carved boxes at World Market for less than $20. I have not made my final decision and made a purchase yet, but I am narrowing down my choices. I have had some other ideas; like labeling the outside of the letters as "private" or "public" to indicate if anybody else should read them or not. When we get our "mailbox" it will be my job to make the letters that Rod writes disappear and it will be his job to make the letters that I write disappear. These are just technicalities and really it's the actual act of writing that releases, almost instantly, the emotions that are causing the problems.

I hope that everybody that reads this can benefit from this simple technique. It really works and it works so fast, it is amazing.

"Use the light that dwells within you to regain your natural clarity of sight."
~ Lao-Tzu~

Forgiveness

"To err is human, to forgive is divine."
~Alexander Pope"


It is a proven fact that unresolved issues drain our energy. Holding a grudge will only hurt the person in possession of the grudge. It's like carrying a sack of potatoes over your shoulder. Chances are if your holding on to a grudge the only person who knows/cares about it is "you". Depending on how consuming it is you will think about it a few times per week or maybe even a few times per day. Either way, every time you think about it you are creating negative energy. This negative energy will attract more negative occurrences to you. Which will give you more negative things to think about, which cause you to create more negative energy. I think you can see where this is going. It is a vicious cycle of "like" attracts "like".

Anybody serious about achieving success and true happiness has to learn how to forgive. There is no way to be 100% happy with a program of negative emotion running in the background. It's like spyware on your computer, just running you down stealing your energy.

So what is the best way to harness forgiveness and make it work for you? First you have to figure out where your energy sucking grudge is hiding. It may be obvious, it may be not so obvious, you may have 1, or you may have a whole handful. It really doesn't matter. Just figure out what they are and write them down.

Once you have a list compiled, read it over and pick the one that "hurts" the most. This will be the one attracting the greatest amount of negative energy to you. If this person is passed or unreachable via phone or letter it is okay. You can still forgive somebody who is not present. Many psychologist believe that letter writing is a great form of therapy. The positive effects are achieved in the process of writing the letter and it does not matter if the letter is ever delivered. You can write a letter of forgiveness, put it in an envelope, and drop it in the nearest dumpster. The important part is that you will be free from that negative emotion associated with that issue now that it is resolved.

Visualization is also a powerful tool. You can visualize yourself delivering your letter of forgiveness and visualize the exact response that you want to achieve. This will not only expel your negative emotion, it will replace it with positive emotion and a feeling of settlement and peace. So now when you think of this person you will conjure up a positive response which will attract more positive energy to you. It's a win win situation.

It will take conscious effort, but in the future when ever you think of the person who was the topic of your forgiveness letter it will be beneficial to yourself to try to remember at least one positive thing about that person. You will have to intentionally direct our mind to focus on the positive for about 30 days, then it will become habit.

If you have a long list of forgiveness to dish out, it is okay to take your time. You may be able to take on 2 or 3 people at a time, but remember you have to be able to continually direct your thoughts about them in a positive way. It can become emotionally draining if your trying to forgive everybody all at once. Take your time and do it right.

Remember this; people do the best they can with the skills they have. Nobody intentionally becomes a bad parent, friend, or spouse. People don't fail in relationships on purpose or just for the fun of it. People fail in relationships because they lack the skills to succeed. They were never taught or never learned the proper way act, respond, love, grow, live, create, etc... By forgiving you will free up your own energy and heart to be happy and joyful. This will be a step in the right direction.

"You must be the change you wish to see in the world"
~ Gandhi~

You Become What You Think About

"All that we are is a product of what we have thought"
~Buddha~

This has got to be my all time favorite quote. I first heard it about it about 4 years ago when I first watch the movie THE SECRET. The words just sung through my mind like music and I began to ponder them. Since then I have read numerous books and listened to many audio programs that have reiterated the essence of that quote. It seems as though there has been a sort of global awareness sparked to the fact that our thoughts create our life.

It is believed that our current results are the product of our previous thoughts. The way to change our future results is to change our current thoughts. We become the essence of what we think about. Fill your mind with thoughts that make you happy and excited. Focus on the story of the life you want to live and watch your results change.

Do not spend another minute complaining about your current situation or worrying about your future. Just choose to be happy and focus on the story of the life you want. It may be hard at first to look past the current situation that you are living, especially if you are not exactly where you would like to be financially, relationally, or spiritually. But remember, dwelling on the negative will only create more of the negative.

The most effective way to redirect your mind is of course to write your vision statement. If you go to the archived posts from late 2008 you will find a handful of posts dedicated to vision statements. It is possible to redirect your thoughts with out writing a vision statement, but it is more effective if you just take the time to write down a little story explaining in details the life you want to live.

It is also effective to create a mental snapshot of something that makes you fell happy and lite hearted. Use this image whenever worry or fear enters your mind. When you catch yourself dwelling on something you don't want just pull up a visual of this mental snapshot and focus on it. It could be you and your spouse on a cruise ship, you could be washing your dream car, or you could be tending to your garden. It does not matter what it is, as long as it makes you feel good.

Just remember, your thoughts create your life and we become what we think about.

The Power of Giving & Sharing

About 3 years have passed since our friend, Ivy, decided she was done having children and no longer needed all her baby stuff. Since I myself was pregnant with our son, Ivy happily gave all her son's baby stuff to Rod and I. We were so grateful to receive such great gifts; clothes, blankets, toys, swing, exersaucer, basically everything we needed.

Right around the time our son turned 1yr old, we found out that baby #2 was on the way. This time it was a little girl. How exciting! Since our son was only a year old we still had almost all of the baby stuff that Ivy had given us. Once again we were so happy and thankful that we would be completely prepared for baby #2.

Our daughter just turned a year old on May 5th and my husband and I have both been anxious to get some of the "baby" stuff out of the living room, like the swing and the exersaucer. We contemplated what to do with it. Should we store it in the attic? Should we donate it to Goodwill? My brother and sister-in-law are having a baby in a few months, but they live 1,600 miles away. We both said "I wish we had someone to give it to."

Have you ever heard the phrase "ask and you shall receive"? Well, the next day at work I had to put a call into one of our co-managing retinal specialists, I was happy when my good friend Stacie answered the phone. I love her and she always makes me laugh. It had been a few months since the last time we spoke, so she had a lot of news to tell me. She told me that Ivy had had just had another little baby boy. I was excited to hear the news. I hadn't talked to Ivy in probably a year. Of course, I got Ivy's phone number from her. I called to congratulate her on the new little boy and to ask her if she would like her baby stuff back. She was so excited and thankful to hear from me. I told her to give me a few days to round up a bunch of stuff for her.

As soon as I got off the phone with her I called my husband and told him the exciting news, he was as excited as any man can be expected to be.

When I told my 2 1/2 yr old son that we were going to go through his and his sister's toys and give them to Ivy's new baby he wasn't very excited about it. Then I explained to him that Ivy was the one who had given him all his baby stuff. I explained how generous she was to let him have all of Austin's baby clothes and toys. I said "Now don't you want to be nice to her and share your stuff with her new baby?' and he said "Yeah, Mommy I wanna share."

We spent a whole afternoon going through every toy box and toy bin. We got all the "baby" toys together and washed them. We dug deep into the closet and found blankets and burp cloths and cute little stuffed animals. We gathered so much stuff that Xavier's bed was completely covered. Once we got everything cleaned and bagged, Xavier kept saying "I want to go share now Mommy, I want to go share." I had to explain to him that we had to wait for Daddy to get home and then we would load up his vehicle and he was going to meet Adam (Ivy's husband) to give him the stuff. Xavier was very persistent and kept saying he wanted to "go share right now". Eventually I got the subject changed with the help of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

The enthusiasm and joy that Xavier got out of finding the "good" baby toys to share with Ivy's new baby was worth a million dollars. And it felt good for me too. It just proves that when you give to someone else you not only help them out, but you also get an extra boost of happiness out of it. Xavier ran around the house all day and night on "cloud nine" talking about all the stuff he was going to share with the new baby.

I encourage you to help yourself to a jolt of "feel good energy", find some stuff you haven't used in a while and give it to someone. The feeling is great!

Quote

"Life has meaning only in a struggle. Triumph or defeat is in the hands of the Gods...So let us celebrate the struggle!"
~Swahili Warrior Song~

"When the student is ready, the teacher will appear"

Have you ever heard the saying; "When the student is ready the teacher will appear"? Today was an example of how that saying rings true. Many of you know that on the first and second Wednesday of each month I attend a 60-70 minute live teleconference with one of my mentors. A few days before the teleconference a group of us receive an email asking if we have any particular questions that we would like answered. The mentor selects 4 or 5 of the questions that are relevant to the day's topic of discussion and tries to answer them in detail.

One of the questions today was "How do I use the law of attraction to help me lose weight?" The funny thing about this topic is one of my very good friends, we will call him CW, has recently expressed his intention to lose 100.6 lbs making his goal weight 225lbs. My friend has struggled with his weight for the better part of his life, with an all time high of 364 lbs. I feel like this topic was discussed today for a reason and that is why I am sharing it. This post is dedicated to my good friend CW. You know you have my support, you are an awesome person and you deserve nothing but the best. The "best" includes being happy and healthy.

The first thing I learned today was that we set ourselves up for failure when we want to "lose" weight. When we "lose" something our subconscious mind will actually set forth motions for us to get it back. Our subconscious mind is so good at getting things back for us that we actually end up gaining back all the weight that we lost and then a few extra pounds for good measure. Instead of wanting to lose weight we should set a goal to achieve health and our ideal weight. It is better to have an actual number to focus on. So my friend, CW, should focus on his goal weight of 225lbs instead of the 100.6 lbs that he wants to lose.

Secondly, we must use the power of the conscious mind to trick the subconscious mind. From previous posts you may remember me telling you that the subconscious mind does not know the difference between fact and fiction. It just takes the info given and processes it all as truth. So how can this help with weight loss, or shall I say ideal weight achievement? Find an image of a person whose body you desire, a fitness or health magazine is a good place to look. Now cut the picture out and replace the head with a picture of your head. Hang it up in a place where you will see it often; your bathroom mirror, the dashboard of your car, or maybe even the ceiling above your bed. Focus on this image several times each day and feel the way you will feel when you reach your ideal weight. Try to get emotions involved, feel the lightness in your heart and joy it will bring you when you are truly healthy. The more you focus on the image and bring about these happy emotions the faster your subconscious mind will start presenting opportunities for you to make healthy changes in your daily habits.

Another thing that was recommended today was to take a piece of paper and write your ideal weight in bold numbers. Take that piece of paper and tape it to your scale. Every morning step on the scale and as you look down to see the weight you can only see your ideal weight. NO peaking under the paper to see what the scale "really" says, just know and believe that your ideal weight is there.

The last thing I learned today was that often times we need to look inside ourselves to find the true reason for our weight problem. It is true that some people are just genetically predispositioned to be heavier, but sometimes there is a psychological reason for the weight gain. For example, if a woman was sexually assaulted as a teenager and is struggling with her weight in her 30's there may be a connection. When the assault happened she subconsciously made the decision to be less attractive to keep predators away. Now she is older and ready to find a mate, but the subconscious mind is still in defense mode and trying to protect her. The only way to overcome this psychological block is to address it and tell yourself it is okay to be thin. The past is in the past and it is time to let go and stop the cycle of self-sabotage. There are many reasons why people may be subconsciously using weight as a protection barrier, it is up to each person to look within themselves to find the answer and let it go.

CW, I hope you find this post helpful. You know I love you, you are my friend and I want nothing but the best for all my friends. Cheers to a journey of good health and ideal weight. A recorded version of our teleseminar is available for download for $10, if you are interested let me know and I will email you the link privately. And of course, I will still donated $100.60 to the charity of your choice once your have met your goal, but instead of focusing on losing 100.6 lbs we are going to focus on achieving your ideal weight of 225lbs. I love you, you have my support every step of the way.

First Quarter Review

Well, today is Thursday March 26th and it is hard to believe that the first quarter is almost behind us. I was always told that time would go by much faster after I had children and it is so true. Sometimes when time is moving at such a rapid pace it is easy to let our focus become scattered. Most of us start the New Year with a list of resolutions. We write the list with enthusiasm and feel very energized as we review it. We think to ourselves; "This is going to be the year that I get organized, live healthy, volunteer my time, paint the house, etc...". We write these resolutions with the very best intentions, but often times we get off track and miss place our list only to forget about it until the following New Year. This is why it is so important to do a quarterly review.

What exactly is a quarterly review and how do you do it? It is simple, find your list of New Year Resolutions and take a look at it. Have you crossed anything off your list? It is human nature to want to feel like we are accomplishing something. Go over your list and cross off or highlight anything that your have finished. This will give you a rewarding feeling and stimulates you to want to do more just so you can cross more off. It is funny how that works, but you can really trick yourself into getting more done by simply crossing stuff off your list.

Now, review the items that are left. Pick the three that rank highest on the importance scale and put a little star next to them. Take a clean sheet of paper and divide it into three sections and label them 1, 2, and 3. Write your top three selections on the page, one in each section. Now under each item write A, B, and C. Here I want you to list three things that you can do for each item that will get the ball rolling. For instance, if your top three items consisted of painting the house, signing your child up for karate, and spending more time with your spouse, your paper may look like this:

1.) PAINT THE HOUSE

A.) go to the paint store and select a few colors

B.) call 3 contractors and get estimates

C.) contact the home owner's association to get color approval

2.) SIGN KIDS UP FOR KARATE

A.) look in the phone book to see who offers classes

B.) visit the schools and meet with the instructor

C.) make arrangements for your child to have a free 1 wk trial

3.) SPEND MORE TIME WITH SPOUSE

A.) talk to your spouse and figure out what you would like to do together

B.) pick 2 nights per month as designated "date nights"

C.) call friends and family and pre-arrange baby sitting for these nights

Now that you have this sub-list you can eagerly get started. Try to do at least one thing on the sub-list everyday until you have completed the list in its entirety and of course you must remember to cross things off as you go. Once you have finished all the items on your sub-list it is time to review your resolutions again and pick the three that rank most important again and repeat the process.

You will find that once you get started you wont want to stop. You may even think of new things to add to your list of resolutions as you go and that is great. The more you do, the more you will want to do. Motivation definitely has a snowball effect and once you get started it is hard to stop.

It is time to get moving and get refocused. All it takes is a little effort. Lets make 2009 the year of accomplishment.

Nothing to Fear but Fear Itself

F antasized
E xperiences
A ppearing
R eal


Lets take a few moments and remember a time when we overcame a fear. It could be anything...the fear of public speaking, the fear of flying, the fear of water, etc... How did you overcome that fear? I will share with you a funny story about how I overcame my fear on snakes.

My first real job was as a kennel tech at a large pet store. I was in charge of taking care of all the cute furry animals and somebody else was in charge of the reptiles and fish. One morning I received a phone call from the owner saying the guy who took care of the reptiles was going to be sick and they needed me to also clean and feed the animals on the reptile side of the store. I figured it would be no big real and I happily agreed. When I was done taking care of the puppies and kittens I went to the other side and started with the iguanas. Next was the snakes. We had 2 farely small ball pythons. I figured I would quickly give them some fresh water and that would be the end of it. But, that was not the case. When I opened the cage I noticed the cover seemed loose. Then I noticed the snakes were not in the cage! Of course I got a bad case of the eeby geebies and started looking on the floor for them. I had a dust pan in my hand and figured I would scoop them up and toss them in the cage and call it a day. I could not find those 2 snakes anywhere! I pulled their cage out and as I glanced up, there they were! They had wrapped themselves around the fluorescent light bulbs above their cage. I was almost delusional with fear and panic. I just knew they wanted to bite me. But I was the only one in the store and I had to get the store ready to open. I took a few moments to regain my composure and then I did what I had to do. I basically had to prey them each off of the light bulbs and put them back in their cage. Of course neither of them bit me and I survived. When it was all said and done I actually felt bad for them. I figured they must have been cold if they broke out of their cage to wrap around the light bulb. Anyways I am no longer scared of snakes. I would never want one as a pet, but I am no longer scared.

Ralph Waldo Emerson said "Do the thing you fear and the death of fear is certain." And it is so true. Fear is really a figment of our imagination. The best way to make fear vanish is to look it in the face and just do it.

Attracting Better Relationships

We all know that the Law of Attraction states that "like attracts like". This means we are attracted to people who match our vibrational field. Knowing this, how do we use the Law of Attraction to "attract" better relationships into our life?

There are a few simple strategies we can use on a daily basis that will raise our vibration and raise the quality of our relationships. Lets start strategy #1 by making a list of all the qualities we would find in our perfect friend. By make a list, I actually mean make a list and write it on paper. We may want to be friends with somebody who is honest, loyal, ambitious, smart, passionate, friendly, motivated, etc... Now take a look at the list and see how many of these qualities you already posses. Which areas could you use a little help. The best way to attract people into your life with the qualities your looking for is to practice refining these very qualities in yourself. Remember "like attracts like". So if you are snobby, materialistic, and self-centered what type of friends do you think you will attract? On the other hand, if you are kind, loving, generous, and friendly what type of friends do you think you will attract?

Strategy #2 involves using James A Ray's strategy of aligning attention with intention. This is like tending to a garden. Whatever you give attention to grows and flourishes. If you are constantly complaining to yourself or other people about the quality of your friends, you are in turn giving attention to how bad the relationship is and in return you will get more of the "bad". On the other hand, if you focus on the great qualities each friend has while over looking the bad you will notice that you will begin to see more of the good. Everybody has at least a few great qualities within them. Once again, like attracts like, so the more you focus on the good the more good there is to focus on.

Strategy#3 calls for you to evaluate where you are spending your free time. Where do you like to hang out? Are you spending a lot of free time in bars, finding friends there, and later complaining that they are too rowdy and drink too much? If you want to find friends that are inspiring, you must first figure out what inspires you and find a group of like minded people to hang out with. If you are interested in art, join an art club. If you are interested in politics and community relations start going to your local city council meetings. If you are interested in helping others, find a charity that inspires you and join their fundraising committee. I am not saying that it is totally impossible to find good quality friends sitting at a bar at 2am, but your chances are better if you look somewhere else.

Using these strategies may feel a little uncomfortable at first and that is okay. Growing is supposed to be challenging. When we chose the comfortable route we do not grow and we all know that "if we're not growing we're dying". Again think of a garden, when the gardener stops tending, the plants stop growing, and soon they begin to die. It is a simple fact of life. We must stay challenged to evolve and grow. Challenge yourself to fit your "perfect friend" profile, challenge yourself to stop complaining and focus on the good, and challenge yourself to join a club, commitee, or group that inspires you.

Ask And It Shall Be Given

Ask, and it shall be given to you;

seek and ye shall find;

knock and it shall be opened unto you.

For every one that asketh, receiveth;

and he that seeketh, findeth;

and to him that knocketh

it shall be opened.

~Matthew 7:7-8

Most of us have heard or read these words before, but how many of us have really taken them to heart? Studies have shown that marriages suffer from lack of communication. Many of us feel that if our spouse really loved us, then we would not have to ask them to do "this or "that" for us because they would automatically know what we want and need. Often times relationships with friends and family can be strained for the very same reasons. We expect the people in our lives to just know what we want without being told.

The Bible says; "Ask and it shall be given to you". Well, what if it is true? What if all we have to do is ask? We are all born with the ability to ask for what we want, if you don't believe me spend some time with my 2 year old son. My neighbors will tell you that mimics that of a broken record at times. That persistence and the ability to ask no matter how ridiculous the request is given to all of us as a birthright and somewhere along the way many of us lost the ability to ask. We get conditioned throughout life to stop being a pest, don't question authority, just shut up and listen, and to do what the doctor says, etc... But what if we just took the time to ask for what we want, ask for that helping hand, and ask for some advice.

I used to be one of those people who almost never asked for what I wanted. I would give hints, but I would almost never come right out and ask. It took me forever to ask for a day off at work. The anxiety of thinking about asking would almost make me sick. Whenever a friend would ask me what I wanted to do, I would always respond with "I don't care, whatever you want to do is fine."

I remember one night, about 4 or 5 yrs ago, going to bed sad because my husband had said earlier in the day that he would rub my feet before we went to bed. When night time came and did not grab my feet and start rubbing, I foolishly thought he did not care. The following morning I was still a little bummed out about it. Rod could sense something was wrong. When he asked I of course was reluctant to tell him, but with some prodding I finally told him. His response was simple. He apologised for forgetting and very plainly said "Why didn't you just ask me? I would have done it for you, I just forgot."

Why didn't I just ask? Hmmm, I am not sure why I didn't, but that is when I started to realise that asking for something is not bad. People are not mind readers and no matter how well your husband (or wife) and friends know you, they can not read your mind. It never hurts to ask whether it is help or advice that you need, the worst that can happen is someone will tell you "no" and it has been my personal experience that most people will do whatever they can to help you. Life is too short to go around scared to ask for what we want. Make a point to have an opinion when asked, ask for help when you need it, and live a happy life.

I will leave you with with the quote from W. Clement Stone;

"If there is something to gain and nothing to lose by asking, by all means ask!"

Free E-zine

Well I am off to NY to visit my family for a week. My grandmother's birthday is tomorrow and I am going up there to celebrate with her. The internet connection in upstate NY is transient at best, so I will not be posting to the blog while I'm up there. I do want to take a quick moment to encourage everybody to sign up for Jim Rohn's free e-zine. It is a email publication fill with valuable information (and it's FREE).

The link is http://jimrohn.com/?kbid=9487 .

See you when I get back!

Coincidentally, I came across this little saying today. Thought it was appropriate considering today's post.

Sticks & Stones

I am almost 100% positive that anybody who has lived through elementary school has heard the words "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me." on more than one occasion. There is a good chance that all of us have actually used the phrase a few times ourselves. What do you think about this school yard phrase? Do you think it rings true, or are you like myself and feel that words are one of the most damaging weapons the human race has at their disposal when used ruthlessly.

Think about it for a moment, a broken leg will heal in 6 weeks. How many people are spending hours of their adulthood in the shrinks office due to the residual effects of damaging words. Sticks and stones may break our bones, but bones will heal easily. Hurtful words will linger in our minds and consume our thoughts. The ironic thing is that words can have a negative effect on both the person saying them and the person receiving them. Negativity is like an infectious disease and it spreads quite rapidly.

It is our responsibility, as positive people living in society, to keep a leash on our tongue. We must think about the words we use and choose them carefully. People are very impressionable no matter what their age. It does none of us any good to live in a society full of damaged souls, yet we have everything to gain from living in a society filled with happiness, health, and confidence. Sometimes hurtful words role off our tongues so easy that we are unconsciously using them. Now is the time to get conscious and make an effort to say positive. This is even more important if there are children in the picture. Lets set a good example and stay positive.

Free Video

Follow this link to see a short interview clip with James A Ray
http://video.gaiam.com/services/link/bcpid3138404001/bctid8327130001

Perception = Reality

It has been proven that how we perceive ourselves and the world around us has a direction influence on how our life plays out. Have you ever met somebody who was always "on top of the world"? Things are always "great" and they never have any major complaints or ailments? How do you think they perceive themselves? Do you think they view themselves as happy, healthy, and abundant? Or do you think they feel like they are sad, sickly, and broke all the time? Chances are if somebody is walking tall and feeling good about life, then they perceive themselves as being happy, healthy, and abundant.



Have you ever heard the phrase "self fulfilling prophecy"? What we think about, comes about. This is just the way the universe works. If we picture ourselves living a well rounded 3 dimensional life (mind, body, and spirit) that is exactly what we will manifest. If we sit around complaining about how terrible the economy is and how bad our life is, guess what.....we get more things to complain about. We always attract and manifest exactly what we give our attention to, there is no way around it.



If we want to improve our lives we must first improve our thoughts and the images that go with our thoughts. The next time you start to get down on yourself or start to complain, make yourself STOP and then force yourself to find something good to focus your attention on.

If you have been reading for a while, you may remember a post lat year where I mentioned a trip I took to the Spiritualist Camp (Cassadaga, FL) for a tarot card reading. At the time I was having major problems with my ex husband and I was fearful that he was going to burn my house down. Anyways, what Rosalia (I think that was her name) told me was that every time I had this thought I had to say "cancel, cancel, cancel" and then go on and replace the thought with a positive thought. She told me way back then, that my thoughts and fears would manifest themselves as reality if I let them consume my mind. It took me years of studying and reading to understand what she meant.

Our thoughts are "things" and they do create. Our perception is our reality. When we upgrade our thoughts and perceptions we upgrade our life.

Now test yourself, how do you perceive the image I added to this post? Is a terrible destructive ice storm or ice a beautiful happening of nature? hmmm....

Skills VS Characteristics

Lets take a few moments and make a list of the 5 people we look up to the most. It can be friends, family members, or even people we don't know on a personal level like a celebrity, a public speaker, a pastor or minister, etc. We want to pick people who possess the qualities that we hold in the highest regard.

Now that we have the list, take a moment and list the 10 qualities that each of these people possess that makes them respectable. What qualities do these people have that made us pick them as our top 5. Things like; honesty, loyalty, ambitious, friendly, enthusiastic, caring, passionate, good listener, positive attitude, fair, encouraging, challenging, motivated, wealthy, humanitarian, etc...

Now take a look at the list of qualities and decide if they are characteristics or skills. A characteristic is something that a person is born with, like a natural ability. And a skill is a learned ability. After reviewing the list, put a "C" by the characteristics and an "S" by the skills. You will probably come up with about 70%-80% skills and 20%-30% characteristics.

Finally, take a look at the characteristics and decide if those characteristics could be learned or if only the lucky few born with them are the ones who can possess them. Chances are that most characteristics can be learned if someone is willing to but forth a little effort.

The moral of this exercise is this; anybody can learn to be highly effective. Anybody can learn to be the the person that people look up to. All we have to do is study ourselves to figure out where we are lacking and then get to work on acquiring and mastering those skills.

With the exception of a select few, we are all born with the same ability to learn to be "great". The difference is where our motivation lies. Are we motivated to learn, grow, and become better. Or are we motivated to remain unmotivated. Remember what Jim Rohn says; "If we're not growing, we're dying." Lets make a conscious decision to grow.

Resistance

How much of our daily "suffering" is unnecessary? What actually causes our suffering? And how much free time and energy would we have left at the end of our day if we just learned to stop resisting and learned to live to be happy?

In "Thresholds of the Mind", by Bill Harris, he makes it very clear that any and all suffering experienced is caused by our own decision to resist what is happening. The decision may be conscious or unconscious, either way, the resistance is what causes the discomfort.

Have you ever been around a person who was complaining about how terrible a situation in their life was? You try to sympathize with their troubles, but no matter how hard you try it just doesn't seem that bad. You may have even told them to "just forget about it" or "just let it be" assuring them that things will be okay. You know in you heart that most of their problem is the way they were looking at their particular situation. James A Ray tells us over and over again to find the good in every situation and that every failure is accompanied by the seeds of success.

Back in November I published a post titled "Just Let Go and Float". I think this is what Bill Harris is trying to tell us to do. We need to stop trying to micro-manage every detail of our life and start living it. Life is going to happen no matter what, so we might as well stop resisting and enjoy it. When we can live our life like a movie being played out in front of us we will be able to enjoy every minute of it.

As a man thinketh....

"As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he."
~Book of Proverbs (23:7)

To Holosync....

As a few of you know, I have been dealing with a battle in my head for the last week or so; "To Holosync or not to Holosync?" I have asked some of you your opinions and have even contacted Centerpointe directly with some questions that I have. I love the idea of an audio program that puts your brainwaves in a meditative state.

In order to have true harmony within ourselves, we have to have a healthy balance between mind, body, and spirit. Spiritual wellness is the hardest to define. You may find that for yourself spirituality is defined by going to church and/or praying. I personally disagree. I know plenty of people who go to church on a regular basis and they are not spiritual at all. I also know a handful of people who rarely go to a formal church but are deeply spiritual.

For me the definition of spirituality is more of a feeling of oneness with a higher power. It's a very intimate connection with our creative force that can not be described with words. It's a calming sense and knowing that there is a greater good for all of us.

When I presented my question; "To Holosync or not to Holosync?" I already knew I was going to purchase some sort of audio meditation program, the question was which one. If you do a little research you will find that there are numerous programs available and most of them are a little less expensive than Holosync. My debate was; Is Holosync worth the extra money? Has Bill Harris really given that much more value to his system than all the others?

Here is my conclusion: Yes, I truly think Bill Harris has created a superior product. After reading "Thresholds of the Mind", a few times. And after reading numerous testimonials of people that have used Holosync. I am certain that the availability of the Centerpointe support team alone is worth the extra money.

The majority of us live our lives in a fairly unconscious state the most of the time. What meditation does is bring us out of that daze and make us more aware of life and everything happening in it. The problem with becoming more aware is that sometimes our new awareness can cause upheaval. When our mind/brain is pushed to a new threshold, if you will, it can cause some discomfort, anxiety, and the feeling of overwhelm until we actually push through that threshold and reorganize ourselves. The Centerpointe team is available via email and phone to help with these times.

The benefits of meditating, whether you use the traditional method or a brain wave altering audio program are the same. I personally do not have the "free" time to spend trying to get to "that" state of meditation that everybody is looking for. The scientifically devised audio tones of the Holosync program takes the listener's brainwave pattern from an unbalance primarily beta state to a bilaterally balanced state consisting of less beta and more alpha, delta, and theta.

I don't want this to get to confusing, for most of us our brains are in a constant state of unbalance and we are over run by the beta waves. When and if we get both hemispheres of the brain synchronized we become more balanced as a person. The presence of less beta waves and more alpha, delta, and theta causes greater creativity, a heightened sense of intuition, higher intelligence, a feeling of oneness, the ability to feel more joy and happiness, the diminish of fears and worries, the benefits are endless.

There have been studies done where some of the greatest Yogi meditaters have been hooked up to an EEG while meditating. Their results were compared to that of the Holosync meditater while listening to the audio program. The similarities between the brainwave patterns are uncanny. In the same study they also compared the EEG results of common people whom had never used any type of meditative practice. You can probably guess what their EEG looked like, an unbalanced mostly beta mess.

I hope that any of you who are serious about making yourself stronger, happier, healthier, etc... will at least take my recommendation and get the free demo CD and make your own decision from there. I think I have stated my case well enough. I feel comfortable with my decision to use Holosync and think it is the wisest choice. Centerpointe also offers a full 1 year money back guarantee. I have heard that most of the people who return the program do so because they think it works too fast and they are not ready for the changes to occur (some people define themselves with their misery and fear if they learn to let go of it they will also lose themselves or their identity in the process). I will keep you updated as changes evolve. Since I do not want to experiencing an "upheaval" while visiting my Grandparents, I have decided to wait to place my order until I get back from New York (mid-February). I will let you know when it arrives.

"You Tell on Youself"

"You tell on yourself
By the friends you seek,
By the very manner in which you speak;
By the way you employ your leisure time,
By the use you make of a dollar or dime.

You tell what you are
By the things you wear,
By the spirit by which your burdens you bear;
By the kind of things at which you laugh,
By the records you play on the phonograph.

You tell on yourself
By the way you talk,
By the manner in which you bear defeat;
By so simple a thing as what you eat.

By the books you choose from the well-filled shelf,
In these ways and more you tell on yourself.
So there is really not a particle of sense,
In your efforts to keep up your false pretense."

~Anonymous~


I thought some of you would enjoy this poem. My friend Ashley R. shared it with me and I think it is just wonderful. I have read it a dozen times since last night and love it more each time I read it.

To Holosync or Not to Holosync, That is the Question

I think I mentioned a few weeks ago that I have become very interested in the effects that meditation has on the brain wave patterns. I am currently on my second read through of "Thresholds of the Mind" by Bill Harris. He is the founder of Centerpointe Research Institute and the creator of the Holosync audio technology. The book is very interesting, I love the science behind it. I believe that I recommended everybody to get the free demo CD that Bill Harris was offering, if I did not, I apologize and I am saying it now; go sign up for your free demo CD, the link is on the upper left side of the blog. It is free so you have nothing to lose. After you get your free demo, you also need to read this book (Thresholds of the Mind). You can go to amazon and get it cheap or go to the library and borrow it for free. Believe it or not, I got my copy for $2 at our local library book sale last month!

If there is anybody reading who has already used the Holosync audio technology, I would love to hear your feedback. It is all new to me. I am about 90% sure that I am going to take the next step and sign up for the program once I finish doing a little more research.

I have tried traditional meditation rituals in the recent past, but with 2 young children it is almost impossible to keep my focus and I usually end up getting frustrated. With the Holosync program you only need 20-30 minutes per day with stereo headphones. The audio tones produce the beta, alpha, theta, and delta brain wave patterns produced in deep meditation. Therefore giving you the positive meditation effects that a lifelong devoted zen monk can produce.

I am very intrigued and would like some feedback, if anybody has some to share.

Appreciation

One of the surefire ways to attract more happiness into our lives it to give it to somebody else first. Remember, the Universe works like a boomerang; what we put out or give we get back in return (amplified). One of the most precious gifts that we can give is appreciation. It is funny how something so valuable is also so affordable, the only cost is time.

Think back to the last time you really appreciated somebody who deserved it. It could of been a friend or relative or even the bagger at the grocery store. Do you remember how "big" and expanded it made you feel to give that bit of appreciation to somebody else? As we give appreciation and kindness to others we attract more things to appreciate into our lives.

Here's an experiment I want everybody to do;
1.) take a 3x5 index card & draw 10 squares on it
2.) in each square write the name of somebody you are going to appreciate
3.) as you appreciate each person you can put a check by their name or color in their box
4.) appreciation ideas include: a phone call, an email, sending a card with a note, a lunch date, a surprise visit (with an explanation of why you appreciate them), a solid handshake and a "THANK YOU", etc....
5.) try to fill the card as quickly as possible and then start on a 2nd index card with different names.....when the second card is filled start a 3rd...keep doing this for 30 days (or longer if you want)
6.) ideas of people to appreciate; spouse, children, parents, siblings, neighbors, best friend from high school, your boss, your high school chemistry teacher, your children's bus driver, the soccer coach, the crossing guard, the cook at your favorite restaurant, the list can go on and on....the more you think, the more people you can come up with....try to focus on the "little" people who may get overlooked and under appreciated on a daily basis.....this will put a smile on their faces (and yours)

****guaranteed to bring happiness into your life before day 30****

How to Take Advantage of the "Winter"

As most of you know, Jim Rohn is one of my favorite authors when it comes to personal development. In many of his books and audio programs he talks about the "seasons" of life. By "seasons" he means the natural cycle. Or the "Law of Rhythm" as James Ray calls it. However we choose to define it, it is safe to say that most of the world has been in a sort of "winter" for the last 10-14 months. How do we stay positive and make the most of our "winter"?

James Ray says we need to "recognize the winter time as a gift". Some may say "How can I call losing my job a gift?" or "How is getting my hours cut a gift?" It is simple. What doesn't kill us will only make us stronger. It is silly not to think there is a force stronger than ourselves guiding us through this journey called life. Things happen for a reason. When something really bad happens we have to assume that there is also something really great about to happen also.

The "winter" is a time to feed our minds. Find something you want to learn about and take a class, read a book, listen to some audio, or watch a DVD about the topic. Invest in yourself, invest in your mind, and invest in your future. The seeds that we plant now determine what we will reap in our next "spring". Take the "gift of winter" and find out what inspires you. Spring is on its way.

It is important to control our focus. We can choose to focus on the "lack" , which creates anxiety and various other negative emotions. Or we can choose to focus on the "opportunity", which creates a feeling of abundance and other positive emotions. From my previous posts you know that emotion creates motion. Emotion sets the law of attraction in motion to create more of what we are "emotional" about.

Spring is coming, it always comes. Be ready to leap forward and achieve your goals.

Success.....

Well, I am back and the marathon was a success!!! It was awesome actually! I am happy to be back home with my family. The Central Florida Chapter of Team in Training raised $480,000 for the Leukemia/Lymphoma Society and all of the chapters combined raised a total of $7 million and that was for the Disney marathon alone. I will admit that there were times when I had my doubts about whether we would meet our fundraising goals. All the teammates really pitched in and we met our goal together. It was a long hard journey, but it was definitely worth the work. One last "THANKS" to all my family, friends, neighbors, co-workers, teammates, and even strangers that helped with the fundraisers.

Now that the holidays are over and the marathon is behind me I can start blogging more frequently again. I still have my goal of 100 readers per day for 2009. So give the link to ANY and ALL the people you know and we can build a community together.

Today's Teleseminar

I must say I am very lucky and grateful that my employer, managers, and fellow employees are flexible with my work schedule. Because of their flexibility I was able to take an hour and 45 minute break in the middle of the day to attend a teleseminar that I signed up for. I try to attend 1 or 2 seminars every month. I always walk away feeling empowered and enlightened. Today's topics were centered around "success" and "principles of success". The host of the teleconference was Jack Canfield. Some of you may recognize his name from the movie "The Secret" and some of you may recognize him as the co-author of the "Chicken Soup for the Soul" series. Either way he is a well respected mentor and success coach.

After reviewing my notes this evening I have made a list of things that I want to share with you. I will start with his success principle #3: Decide what you want & be very clear. He says to have a vivid image of what you want and how you will feel when you have "it". He says that most people do not get what they want because they never actually sit down and figure out exactly what it is that they want. I think this success principle goes hand in hand with what I have been harping on for months, get your vision statement written. How can we expect to get to where we want to go in life if we don't even know where it is that we are going?

When Jack says "feel how you will feel when you have it", he is talking about the emotion. Remember what I said previously; emotion = motion = results. Emotions drive the subconscious mind and the subconscious mind is like a navigation system steering us towards the results that we are looking for. Focus emotions on joy and happiness and the definite picture of the life that we want and that is the direction the subconscious mind will steer us.

January is the perfect time to review our goals and vision statements and make the modifications for the upcoming year. I know 2009 is going to be a great year. The harder a ball falls, the higher it bounces and we (the world as a whole) are due for a bounce. There is a quote that James A Ray says that has been ringing through my ears for a few weeks now. It is from Ancient Text and it goes; "In times of change the learners will inherit the world, while the learned will remain beautifully equipped for a world that no longer exists". I think it is just brilliant. It is amazing to me how it is so relevant to today. 2008 was definitely a "time of change". Years from now students will undoubtedly be learning about it in History class. We need to learn to adapt and prosper in this new environment that has been created.

I saw my hairdresser after work for a new hair-do and she was telling me how her husband had decided a week ago to go back to school. He had already graduated with a film degree a while back, but he makes a living as a welder. With the building/construction field at a standstill (in Central Florida) work has been sparse. I think the above quote is perfect for him. He has chosen to be a "learner" not the "learned".

To be a "learner" you do not have to necessarily go to college full time. You can pick a topic to learn about and read a few books, remember a library card is free. You can take a single class at the local Community College. You can attend a seminar. Anything you do to better yourself is a step in the right direction. Lets take the next few weeks in January to put our revised vision statements in writing and revise our short term goal list. Lets make sure we do all we can to have a great 2009.

Quote

"Your thoughts create your life."
~JAMES A RAY~

Quote

"There are only two ways to live your life. One is as if everything is a miracle, and the other is as if nothing is."
~ALBERT EINSTEIN~

Christmas for the Homeless Pictures

Christmas for the Homeless

I wanted to take a moment and say "THANKS" once again to everybody that helped with Robin's Christmas for the homeless. Our Christmas party was a major hit and all of your donations were much appreciated. As most of you know Robin and Jen received 50 backpacks from the police department and the goal was to be able to fill them with essential items & snacks and pass them out at the annual Christmas dinner that Robin's church holds for the homeless. Jen was later able to get an additional 20 backpacks. I believe the final head count for dinner was around 85! Luckily there were enough donations, just not enough backpacks. The last group of people were given their gifts in a plastic grocery bag. Robin told me that next year she is going to shoot for 100 filled backpacks. I am going to post some of the pictures taken at the dinner. Yes, the children in the pictures are homeless and it is ashame. But if you look close you will see that the children are smiling. We can feel good knowing that we helped put a smile on their faces.